Get in Now While the Getting’s Good

John Welch finds that the sexual abuse industry rolls on unabated.

Sexual Abuse Rort

ACC (aka “Aggrieved Clamouring Claimants”) has thrown the doors wide open for sexual abuse claimants. They have budgeted 60 million dollars for sufferers who can claim up to $175,000 “without having to complain to the Police or name their abuser.” Not surprisingly, a Christchurch Law Firm has shown commendable initiative in touting for business with a leaflet drop because “lawyers had a professional obligation to make the public aware of entitlements.”

It is highly significant that a Christchurch firm has seen fit to profit from this ludicrous state of affairs. Proof of sexual abuse has never been required in Christchurch, the Salem of the South Pacific. Dozens of families pocketed tens of thousands of dollars for sexual abuse that never happened while dedicated and talented Christchurch Civic Creche workers had their lives ruined.

I am not sure that James Randi would approve of my challenge but here it is. I offer my endorsement of any claimant who is prepared to claim for ‘ritual satanic alien abuse’, especially if it occurs in a parallel universe.

Given the refusal of the Minister of Justice to read Lynley Hood’s book on the Christchurch Civic Creche debacle, readers could be forgiven for thinking that he and key members of the legal profession currently inhabit a parallel universe.

Several years ago a man spent $80,000 defending himself against charges of sexual abuse “remembered” by his two daughters. He was acquitted as he was able to prove that the alleged abuse not only did not happen but it was impossible for it to happen. A reporter reasonably asked the question of ACC whether the two daughters would have to repay their compensation. “Oh no,” said the Spokesperson, “they are entitled to it for their suffering.”

The budgeted sum of 60 million dollars will experience a blowout version of “Welch’s Law” which states that claims expand to take up the amount of compensation available.

Marlborough Express 9 Jan 2002

The Vigorex Products – Oat cuisine?

These are homeopathic extracts of ‘avena sativa’ and contain nothing injurious to health. Readers familiar with homeopathic theory will know that such a product description is entirely true. Homeopathic preparations contain precisely nothing and placebo controlled trials of homeopathic preparations are in fact trials of one placebo versus another. This explains why placebo controlled trials of homeopathy will sometimes produce a result favouring the homeopathic wing of the trial. This led one wag to suggest that what was needed were “double-strength” placebos!

Vigorex is a product developed from oats. Readers will be interested in the admission that “skeptics have doubted the existence of an effective sex enhancer.”

Reports indicated that “some fell (sic) an increase in energy within one or two hours and use it instead of coffee to get going in the morning … some say they start taking it on a Thursday or Friday in anticipation of a sexual weekend.”

I decided to rise to the challenge, hopefully in every sense. After extensive product testing I have to say that my wife developed a headache which was not relieved by another homeopathic preparation.

The Scots have eaten porridge for years so there may be more to this than meets the eye.

Pamphlet Supplied

Homeopathy useless against Malaria

Because of conventional drug side effects, a woman decided to rely on homeopathic drugs for malaria protection whilst holidaying in Africa. These homeopathic products were made from “African swamp water containing impurities, algae and plants as well as mosquito slough, larvae and eggs.” Following her return home she became very unwell and was admitted to an intensive care unit with multiple organ system failure due to malaria infection.

There will be no claim for medicolegal liability because “the manufacturer, who has performed no clinical trials on this drug, declines all responsibility regarding its use.”

Homeopathic remedies should only be used for harmless self-limiting disorders that require no treatment, which is precisely what homeopathy is all about.

BMJ Vol 321 18 Nov 2000 p 1288

Kentucky Fried Medicine

The NZ Health Authorities recently had to warn all doctors that two Chinese herbal medicine capsules contained the potent corticosteroid betamethasone. These were Cheng Kum and Shen Loon. The Ministry of Health had earlier removed Cheng Kum from the market when it was shown to contain the antihistamine chlorpheniramine.

Since most Chinese herbal remedies are either useless or dangerous it is hardly surprising that they are incorporating effective Western drugs in a fraudulent attempt to demonstrate effectiveness. The same problem has occurred in the UK where random tests were still finding banned substances such as mercury, arsenic and steroids in traditional Chinese medicine. Some also contained parts from endangered animal species.

Why should we respect medieval beliefs that endanger the continued existence of magnificent animals such as tigers because superstition demands the use of their bones? The criminals responsible for these excesses should be ground up themselves and processed into traditional remedies, and in this spirit I have formed a company marketing a new herbal remedy for cats called Meow Zedung.

BMJ Vol 323 6 Oct 2001 p770; MEDSAFE 14 Dec 2001

Flux for Flux?

While in Ireland recently I kept a watchful eye for useful material and was not disappointed by an article in the Irish Examiner of 14-11-01. A company managed to sell to over 485 schools, a $70 magnetic clip designed to be attached to the underwear and claimed to “banish the misery of painful periods.” The device is the size of a 10p piece and it is claimed “sends out a magnetic field which penetrates up to 7 inches into the body.”

This device is a classic placebo and it is easy to see how successful it would be in a Priest-ridden country where the Catholic religion ensures young women are made to feel bad about their emerging sexuality.

The article goes on to make the following claim “…66 out of 100 painful period sufferers took significantly less medication when wearing the device during their periods.” If these young women received sympathetic advice and explanation about their periods in a climate of healthy acceptance, there would be an equally impressive improvement.

I know of a much better market for this device. Some enterprising person should promote it for male impotence.

Fad Allergies

Around 20 in 100 Britains believe they suffer from allergies and intolerance to dairy foods and wheat-based products. However, nutritional research reveals the true figure is less than 1 per 100.

This is an area rife with quacks conducting all sorts of unscientific tests and giving potentially dangerous advice. People are using food allergies and intolerance as an excuse for weight gain and niggling health problems such as every GP’s fear – TATT (tired all the time) syndrome. The very idea that you can have a food allergy and gain weight is preposterous.

The Daily Telegraph 5 Nov 2001

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